Part of the Blogging A to Z Challenge. I’m blogging every day in April, except Sundays, thematically from A to Z. Find out more here.
L is for letting go. Sometimes it’s letting go of a friendship. A husband. A career. A child. A parent.
There comes a time when we face a loss and have to let go.
The toxic friend who suffocates you and puts you down. The husband who can’t commit. The career that stresses you out. The child who needs to learn from his own mistakes. The parent who dies.
I recall the first time I let go of my son’s hand and let him run out in the wide open spaces. He jogged crookedly across a vast field. His toddler legs carried him wildly as he headed into the great unknown. I wanted his hand in mine, but I knew it was time to let him go. I could still see him and that would have to be enough. But anxiety gripped my heart until his small hand was back in mine, warm and gripping.
My nine year old son wants to walk to school by himself now. I see other children his age doing it. It’s only half a mile. Down the path. Over the bridge and through the woods. Across the road. I can see his route. We’ve taken it so many times. I walked to school a mile through the woods when I was eight. But these are different times. We are more aware. A curse or a blessing?
I tell my son ‘no’. I will walk to school with him. I don’t hold his hand anymore. But I see him. He’s here beside me in my world. I can’t let go just yet. I remember him as a toddler in those wide open spaces. Nothing protecting him. The world could suck him up. I wouldn’t be there to save him. Someday soon I will be able to let go and he won’t need saving. He’ll be his own hero.
The blessing in letting go is to let go with no regret. It makes the experience all worthwhile. An experience that shapes you. Changes you.
On this date three years ago I let go of my mother. I held her hand. I said my goodbyes. I cherished the time. She drifted away. And then I let go.
What have you let go of recently? And did you do it with no regret?