Part of the Blogging A to Z Challenge. I’m blogging every day in April, except Sundays, thematically from A to Z. Find out more here.
You have to let go eventually
L is for letting go. Sometimes it’s letting go of a friendship. A husband. A career. A child. A parent.
There comes a time when we face a loss and have to let go.
The toxic friend who suffocates you and puts you down. The husband who can’t commit. The career that stresses you out. The child who needs to learn from his own mistakes. The parent who dies.
I recall the first time I let go of my son’s hand and let him run out in the wide open spaces. He jogged crookedly across a vast field. His toddler legs carried him wildly as he headed into the great unknown. I wanted his hand in mine, but I knew it was time to let him go. I could still see him and that would have to be enough. But anxiety gripped my heart until his small hand was back in mine, warm and gripping.
My nine year old son wants to walk to school by himself now. I see other children his age doing it. It’s only montauk-monster.com/pharmacy/cialis half a mile. Down the path. Over the bridge and through the woods. Across the road. I can see his route. We’ve taken it so many times. I walked to school a mile through the woods when I was eight. But these are different times. We are more aware. A curse or a blessing?
I tell my son ‘no’. I will walk to school with him. I don’t hold his hand anymore. But I see him. He’s here beside me in my world. I can’t let go just yet. I remember him as a toddler in those wide open spaces. Nothing protecting him. The world could suck him up. I wouldn’t be there to save him. Someday soon I will be able to let go and he won’t need saving. He’ll be his own hero.
The blessing in letting go is to let go with no regret. It makes the experience all worthwhile. An experience that shapes you. Changes you.
On this date three years ago I let go of my mother. I held her hand. I said my goodbyes. I cherished the time. She drifted away. And then I let go.
No regret.
Just peace.
What have you let go of recently? And did you do it with no regret?
For the past (almost) 7 months, I’ve been working on a list (40 things to do before I turn 40). A few items on my list are things to give up. Those have been the hardest for me…whether they be emotional let-gos, or physical. But ya know what, there’s nothing better than a good purge. I always walk away feeling lighter.
Great blog. Just hoppin’ by on A-Z challenge. Keep up the great work!
Ophelia, what a wonderful list. Only I’ll have to make mine 50 – LOL. When I turned 40 I too realized life was too short and I needed to make my dream come alive- that’s when I sat down and wrote my first novel. My letting go to do it was “stop editing as I go”. Once I let that go I got the THE END. Good luck with your list!
I try to let go of my each day in order to hang on the Lord Jesus Christ.
I let go of the curtains I made for my boys in our country place. The curtains have become weather-stained and bleached out. The fabric I’d picked out for them was so cool: a tossed pattern of grasshoppers and beetles. Having kids is a contstant process of letting go. I’m very good at it, but sometimes, as with those curtains, I get tripped up in sad emotions.
Oh, Catherine, I can so connect to that! What lovely memories to have. Yes, letting go is a constant with kids. I finally knew I had to get rid of my mom’s clothes. So I had them made into a large quilt. She loved wearing holiday and seasonal garb – so I had those create into “throws” for the couch for different times of the year. Now they will be part of my everyday.
Beautiful post Donna. Letting go is something that can bring both a lot of pain and a lot of peace. I love the idea of turning your mom’s clothes into a large quilt. That way you always have them with you.
I remember the first time I let go of a toxic friend…it was hard but my life was so much better.
Oh, yes me too, Donna. I first did it years ago and recently this year. Sad but no regret. I made the huge decision to cut my natural mother out of my life recently after many toxic years with her – and I really do not regret that! A relief to have made a decision.
Beautifully written. I know how you feel about the toxic mother… sad but true. 🙂
This is a lovely post. I let go of my mother 4 years ago…and I do have regrets; regrets that that couldn’t have her around for even longer! I’ve also let go of walking my children to school quite recently (a year ago)…they were 8 and 10. It’s hard to do but also very necessary!
Rhia from Five Minute Piece for Inspiration (around #777 on the A to Z list)
Rhia, I think I could let go of my son walking to school too if he walked with a friend or sibling. That would make it easier for sure. I wonder every day why my mom was taken when she was so vibrant and full of life and then others lead depressing lives and linger on forever. I dont guess its up to us to decide that though!
Letting go is definitely a learned art. Sometimes it’s hard to be graceful about it (for example, deciding to let my daughter wear makeup when she was 12), sometimes it’s hard to be sure the time is right, and sometimes it’s just plain hard.
What a beautiful “thinky” post. I’ll be back to read more as April progresses, and beyond that.
Kern, you are right on those thoughts. Letting go is harder especially when we have a choice. Is it the right one? the right time? hard to always know and we just have to try and make the best decision with the information we have, and follow our heart.